GeoCities had suffered a long and drawn-out battle with its health over the past decade. An antiquated service model and outdated technology are widely blamed for the struggle. An official cause of death, however, has yet to be determined.
GeoCities: 1995 - 2009
GeoCities was born as "Beverly Hills Internet" in the winter of 1995. Its parents, David Bohnett and John Rezner, wanted to create a virtual community that mimicked the real world, with pages hosted in "cyber cities" and other similarly nauseating concepts.
Both teenagers and first-generation Internet dorks (known then as "former SysOps") flocked to the service, setting up personal pages in the "cyber cities" of their choice. Despite GeoCities' built-in watermarks and on-page advertisements, the site's popularity continued to climb, and the shame its users should have felt for creating abhorrent content within its servers continued to remain repressed
It was around this time that GeoCities began showing the first symptoms of the medical issues that would plague it for the remainder of its life. GeoCities grew weaker by the month. The proliferation of low-cost hosting options, combined with the increasing popularity of social network-style services in place of personal home pages, only contributed to its demise.
GeoCities is survived by two cousins, Angelfire and Tripod, along with an uncle, Jeeves. All three are believed to be terminally ill.
Of the 12 remaining GeoCities users, only one was available for comment. "Holy crap!" said the user, a red-faced fellow named Strong Bad. "The scroll buttons and animated GIFs on that site were unbeatable."
The GeoCities site is expected to remain functional through midyear as a tribute to its life. Funeral arrangements are now pending.
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